Carrying the Message with Step Twelve

Addictive Eaters Anonymous Step Twelve: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addictive eaters, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

A member of Addictive Eaters Anonymous spoke to other AEA members about their experience of living the Twelve Steps. This blog is Part Two of the edited transcript of one member's interview on Step Twelve. All the readings referred to come from Step Twelve in the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous book.

Now I want to read a little about carrying the message. It says, “Practically every member declares that no satisfaction has been deeper, no joy greater than in a Twelfth Step job well done” (Pg. 110). Could you describe a bit about your Step 12 work and the ways in which you carry it out? This is also about working with others in your daily life. How do you live that today? 

By trying to cultivate a willingness to always be there. Like the Toronto Declaration in Alcoholics Anonymous, I want the hand of Addictive Eaters Anonymous always to be there. And for that I am responsible. I very much try to follow the example of other AEA members. I have seen my sponsor and other longtime members perform prodigies of service over many years. And they continue to do that on a daily basis. The more they do it, the more willingness they have to do it. It is the same for me. But it doesn't always come naturally. 

I often think back to quite a few years ago when I was on an AA answerphone service one Saturday night. It had been a busy week and I wanted to sit down and watch the Rugby World Cup playoffs. Then just before the first game, the phone went and it was somebody in relapse. He desperately wanted to go to a meeting. Straightaway. I thought, who can I get to take this person to that meeting because I had my night mapped out? But between the few steps that it took me to cross the room and get the meetings list, the thought came, “What would your sponsor do in this situation?” I knew that my sponsor would have turned the TV off and driven this person to the meeting. So when I went back to the phone, I said I would take him. That doesn't come naturally for me; it comes from being exposed to the love and service of other people. 

I try, no matter what happens in my life, to be willing to carry this message of recovery.  And I guess that is all the 12th Step asks us to do is to try. For years, I have been hung up on trying to carry the message, with no one getting sober. I have thought I can't be very good at carrying the message and maybe someone else should do it. That was a wee bit of my attitude. But it doesn't actually say that. It just says we try to carry this message. I agree with the reading about the absolute bright spot being working with a newcomer and seeing them get well. It sounds corny, but it beats any feeling I had from food or alcohol or other substances. It is a joy. It is a gift to be around that kind of recovery.

I'm constantly awed by the amount of service that people do in AEA, and I know that even if I could live for another 50 years, which is mathematically impossible, I could not begin to match that service. But I can try. I can try to be available no matter what is happening. Sometimes it means putting myself out, but it never feels like putting myself out, to be honest. It feels like a privilege. Passing it on. That's all we do. That's where this program started, with alcoholics passing it on.